Cheating Wife Stories

I feel my wife is preoccupied with the internet and I have control over the service bill payment and I am disconnecting it for now.
How should I counsel her while this is taking place? Joe

I found out about my wife's affair last year Feb. 06. Why is it that I can't get it out of my head. Ever since I found out we fight every day, what is worse we fight in front of our 5 yr. and 7 yr. old girls.I love her but I hate what she did to me, in fact I hate the _ _ _
with so much I wish I could do something to him. I won't for my family's sake but it's eating me up inside. I forgave her in words but my heart hasn't. It's too much pain, anger mostly the sad part is going away but the hate is still there. Please help if you can with some advice I can't go on any longer feeling like this. Thanks Ricky

My wife had what she termed a flirtatious relationship with another man. I found love notes and cards that would lead one to believe it was much more than claimed. We initially started marriage counseling. We attended two sessions at which time my wife decided it was beneficial to me but not helping her. I have since continued the counseling as the affair has shaken me to the core. While we were both in counseling my wife continued to contact the other man through a prepaid cell phone. I have so many questions. Primarily, what do I do? I feel I am the only one trying to make this work. I am trying not to smother her but yet she still comes home late and makes up reasons to go out alone. Thank you for your consideration. Tom

We been married for 10 years and have 3 kids: 8, 6 and 4.
My wife doesn't love me anymore and has mostly negative feelings about the past. I found out about a 2 year affair she was having about 1 year ago. We've tried several counselors but she still has hate and anger towards me and dwells on the past with a negative viewpoint. Our marriage has been very stressful with the kids and my career. She has not been very supportive and treats me with little respective. I am at my wits end having dealt with the infidelity and little respect for the past 5 years. I really want our marriage to work out but do not see her wanting the same. I feel that I'm just spinning my wheels with little to no positive progress. When do I know that our marriage is truly a lost cause and it's time to move on? What can I do to get her to move towards me? I feel like my only options are to either tolerate her complacency or leave the marriage. Mike

My wife and I have been having problems these past few months communicating. Recently, she suggested we go to counseling and we had our first session last week. We have been talking ever since.

I have noticed though, when she goes out alone, things are taking longer to get done, ex. Food shopping three hours when it used to be one, emails from our home computer in secret at odd times of the day, hiding her cell phone in the house.

She is going out on Wednesday night and she told me about it. She first told me she was going to watch her friend's dog and now she is telling me she is going out to dinner with her friends.

I know something is going on, but I'm afraid to ask. I love my wife with all my heart and soul, but I want to approach her about possible cheating.

How do I do this without any real proof? How do I know she isn't lying to me when I already think she is? Anon.

I have a problem I have some feelings for my friend's wife. I feel the need to be around her to talk to her to pick on her, etc. I feel as though I want more and more of her attention. I love them both my friend and his wife, The only problem is this Dec. I will be married to my wife for 1 year. My wife is nothing like my friend's wife, my friend's wife is outgoing, sweet, smiles a lot, has that southern accent when she talks, likes the things I like and her husband likes, she's someone I wished I had married or married her before my friend did. My wife nags, whines, rather sleep her life away than to be with me and enjoy some of the things I like. I really try to be there for my wife and pls. her an any way but I always find myself thinking of my friends wife. Well I pretty much let you know whose on my mind. I know this isn't right and I would feel bad if my friend knew. Could you tell me why I'm having such strong feelings towards the wrong woman. What can I do the help myself be 100% there for my wife.
Thank much, Brandon

My fiancee and I have been together for 4 years. My fiancee has been married twice before, I have been married once before. About 2 years ago, she told me she was uncertain about our relationship and wanted to start seeing one of her ex-lovers to see if there anything still existed. I broke off our relationship. She came back the next day saying she had made a mistake and wanted to get back together. Five months ago, I found out that my fiancee had secretly had an affair with a married man several years ago while we were together and had made plans to leave town to she him again this past April. She had also had an affair with the same married man during her first marriage. I broke up with her again vowing never to have anything to do with her. She came back to me after a month saying she had broken everything off with the married man and had canceled her trip to see him. She said I was the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with and could not see herself with any other man. I decided to get back with her again under the condition that she have no further contact whatsoever with her ex-lovers. I told her I need her to show true remorse, that she had no other men romantically involved in her live and that I was the only man that she was intimate with. I am at a cross roads right now and I think it is time I end this relationship for good. She has shown no remorse for her past actions. I have brought the issue up a couple of times and she insists I am damaging our relationship by not letting go of the past. I found out recently that she is still talking to her married ex-lover. I also suspect out that one of her old male friends may be much more. I recently found an e-mail from him and he crazy about her and says he misses her dearly. I feel that I cannot trust my fiancee and think it is time I move on. What should I do? Mike

I am a 28 year old male who's been married for 1 year and 45 days. Just recently I made one of the most heart wrenching discoveries ever. I found out that my new wife (who is 22 years old) has been cheating on me for a year and a half. My heart is completely broken and I think I'm going out of my mind. I was using our computer when I noticed an email address account that was unfamiliar to me. I clicked on it to discover a secret name that my wife had been using to communicate with a married man. The emails went into details about them loving each other, not wanting to make mistakes, the possibilities of have sex, etc. Here is where it gets interesting; they never met face to face. The have only been sending emails and talking on the phone. The emails did indicate that physical interactions (sex, seeing, touching, kissing, etc.) had not taken place. However, they were scheduled to meet in Baton Rouge, LA but Katrina had other plans. I was supposed to attend a work-related conference there but the storm forced my job to change locations so my wife and I never made it to LA. When we talk about it she says her reason for doing it was the "excitement" or anticipation of receiving responses. She said she liked being in control (which I say she never had). She insists that she did not love him, have any emotional attachments, or plan on having a physical relationship. To her it was strictly about getting responses and being in control. I totally disagree. I feel she did love him (why else would she say it in an email), had emotional attachments, and was going to have a physical relationship with him. CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME/US? I don't know what to do. I'm going crazy and my wife is having suicidal thoughts every day. Will we ever see eye to eye and be able to go back to the way it was. Thank you. John

How can I advice my wife who is committing adultery to break up with the person she is committing adultery with? Tawaih

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I became friends with this girl 2 years ago when I had a girlfriend too but I wasn't living at home during that time. My friend and I became close and ended up taking things further like sex. I have moved back home and married my girlfriend and now im finding myself wanting to be close to my friend that I left behind in another state. I call her more than I do my own wife I can't get her out of my head and cant stop thinking about her I even find myself wanting to be with her and have sex with her again. What can I do and why am I having these feelings towards her and not my wife? Please help me. Lance

I found out that my wife has been seeing her old boyfriend and lover when she visits her parents. They have also been corresponding. It's been going on for a very, very long time. It was a total surprise for me. I was shocked. She maintains she did nothing wrong because "nothing happened." She says they weren't having sex and she says their "meetings" weren't romantic. But, assuming she is telling the truth, it seems to me that having dinner, corresponding, exchanging photographs and going for walks with your old lover is pretty romantic. She says she didn't tell me about it because she didn't think I'd mind. I consider this contact a huge betrayal of our marriage. Am I nuts? Wouldn't most spouses consider this a betrayal? Doug