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Relationship
Tips - How to Have a Healthy Relationship
According to Marg.Paul
Ph.D author of Do
I Have to Give Up Me to Be Loved by You? (Second Edition)
regarding intimacy in relationships. One of her questions was, "What are
some of the easy ways in which husband and wife can bond - without candles and
wine and expensive lingerie?" Easy ways? Well, it depends on what you mean
by easy! Bonding
has nothing to do with candles, wine and expensive lingerie. It has to do with
INTENT. In any given moment we are in one of two possible intents: *
The intent to have control over getting love and avoiding pain
* The intent
to learn about being loving to ourselves and to others Virtually
all of us have learned many ways of trying to have control over getting love and
avoiding pain. We learned these protective behaviors when we were children, and
as adults we unconsciously continue these learned controlling behaviors, such
as anger, criticism, withdrawal, resistance, or compliance. For most people, these
protective, controlling behaviors have become automatic and habitual. As soon
as any fear is triggered, we automatically protect against the fear by arguing,
blaming, attacking, judging, shutting down, resisting, or giving in. In relationships,
the fears of rejection and engulfment - of losing the other or losing ourselves
- generally underlie our protective behavior.
If
both are open to learning, then they will be emotionally available to each other
and can bond with a touch, a smile, or a kind word. Bonding has to do with the
energy between them, not with anything external like candles, and the energy comes
from their intent. A controlling intent creates a heavy, dark, hard, closed-hearted
energy, while the open-to-learning intent creates a light, soft, open-hearted
energy. The big
challenge in relationships is to stay open to learning about loving. Because we
automatically and unconsciously revert to our protective, controlling behavior
in the face of fear, being open to learning needs to be a conscious choice. Developing
the ability to make a conscious choice regarding your intent is a learning process.
The hallmark of higher consciousness is being able to choose your intent each
and every moment, even in the face of fear.
Relationship Tips for 2007
One of the most common
methods in preventing a divorce is to NEVER PLEAD OR DO WHATEVER your partner
wishes to get that person to return to your life. It's common that humans think
this way, but it shows your partner that you are weak and emotionally attached.
You also need to be confident in whatever you do. Don't say to your partner, "You
are my only true love and without you I am nothing", or "There is no
one in the world like you." For the wife, she will think you are weak and
not a real man. As a woman, they need a man to protect them and help them. They
do not want a girlie man who they have to take care of or protect. You
need to let your spouse know that you don't really need a partner by being confident
and strong. You don't want to show your partner that you need them and this in
turn will make them more attractive to you. Every time your partner gets it his
way, your partner will have the upper advantage and will want you to change. You
need to show them that you have the power and how you can live without them. Do
not make them the center of your world and they will want you back. Your partner
will always wonder how you can live without them and they will wonder what they
are missing out by not being with you. It is perfectly natural for someone who
wants to leave you to disagree with your opinion, but be happy and consistent
with what you do. This will help establish credibility and make it easier for
your partner to believe in you. It definitely increases your confidence level.
NEVER let your
partner control you and give in because it will only make them stronger and cause
additional conflicts for yourself. One side will want one thing, and the other
side will give in, but in the long run it will just cause depression for the other
person. Confidence is the key in maintaining the attractiveness factor in the
long run. What to know more? - click
here
Relationships Tips - If You Have Lost all Hope 
Any
broken relationship where at least one partner is willing to fight to save it
is already on its way to salvation and unity. BELIEVE IT. It’s the relationships
where BOTH partners have called it “quits” where there is little to
no chance of saving it.
Your relationship with your spouse is important but you must implement marriage
saving strategies ASAP before you lose your spouse forever! These
REAL results have helped people in desperate situations just like yourself come
around to not only save their relationships, but actually improve and deepen their
love lives to a greater depth than they ever had before, or even thought possible. What
Should you Do Now - Click Here
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AskMaple-Relationship
Tips 
